BANANA GRABBERS DOT COM

I'm going to be reading twice this weekend. They will both be so brief that I'm not writing this to say you should come and see me; but they're both cool events, and I hope to see you there if either intrigues you.

On Friday (tomorrow!), I'll be participating in the Writers House's marathon reading of Kurt Vonnegut's Slaughterhouse-Five. It's a great book, and should be a great read. Last year, we read Lolita straight through, and the year before that we tackled On the Road. The reading starts at 3 pm. There may even be some open slots when you arrive, so you can not only take in the book and devour book-appropriate snacks, you may also be able to read for a few minutes!

On Sunday, I'll be at Robin's Bookstore for the 13th Annual Poetry Ink event. I'll be one of more than one hundred poets reading their work for 3 minutes or less. The event begins at 1 pm. The readers are scheduled alphabetically, so I should be reading my poem between 1:30 and 2:30 pm, depending on the timing of others.

Yes, it's a weekend of lengthy marathon readings. Hope to see you there.

I've blogged about Moira Moody's Scrapbook project several times.  It culminates tomorrow night at the Writers House, when Mo hosts a program and invites several of her contributors to read work that they contributed to the collection.  I'm honored to be included in that group.

So, you have two duties tomorrow: vote, of course, but do it in the morning so you can attend the program in the evening.  It begins at 6 pm.  3805 Locust Walk.  Free!  Be there.

I wrote another poem for Moira Moody's Scrapbook project. You can read the poem here. Mo is in the process of collecting pieces and adding them to the appropriate pieces in her gallery. Her site now has a handy page listing all of the posted work.

Here is another piece of "Craig's Poems."  Used best when read.

"Hey Babe, Take a Walk on the Wild Side"
I'm ready for a wild time
Candy came from Miami, FLA
Clean cut white professional guy looking for some fun
Hitchhiked across the USA
Can host
Hustle here
Or travel
Hustle there
What do you look like like?
NYC's the place where
I'll come over and show you my skills

I wrote another poem for Moira Moody's Scrapbook project.  You can read it here, and read my previous post about the project here.

"Craig's Poems" sucks. The poem below is about a vacuum. Get it?

"Orange Dyson Vacuum"
I'm interested.
I'm very interested.
I will make you an offer.
What model number is the vacuum?
Can you tell me what model it is?
Please give me a number.
I'm in need of a good vac.
We need a good one.
I have no idea how much to offer.
I just want a good deal.
Please let me know what you're looking for.
And a little about the vac, if you can.

Working "Craig's Poems" like it's my job!

"Seeking Artist To Paint Portrait"
Hello there.
I am an artist.
I am working in digital media, outputted onto canvas.
Most are a floral approach.
If this style excites you, kindly contact me.

I also have a new Illustrative style.
I can show you that style.
I have the ability to capture both realistic and impressionistic styles.
Please let me know if my style is something you are interested in.
I have a style that might appeal to you.

I am a surrealist.
I paint with character and imagination.
I am also a professional photographer.
I pay the strictest attention to the laws of permanence.
I can curb the imagination and hold onto character.
My medium is colored pencil.
I am just as capable using other mediums.
However, I do not exactly like that.

I am looking for work.
I work quickly.
I truly love what I do.
I like to exaggerate.
I can paint traditionally.
I wouldn't expect to play some game with you.
I am a commercial artist as well as a fine artist.

Don't let the distance fool you.
My work will last indefinitely if properly protected.
Norman Rockwell was great at doing this.
I have done portraits of pets before.
I have done a self-portrait.
My work is largely abstract.

I want to paint your family.
I charge a flat fee of one thousand dollars.
You can keep the leftover supplies.
Good health and God bless.

Something about "Craig's Poems" goes here. Remember to italicize.

"VHS Tapes of Live Aid"
I was logging out.
I remember seeing them a few years ago.
I don't think you can legally sell them.
I just wanted to let you know that.

Scammers and low lifes offer to take the tapes.
Others say they will pay you a ton of money.
All you have to do is give the tapes to a courier.
Something like that.
I just wanted to give you that piece of information.

Anyway, I am interested in these.
How much do you want?

In other BananaGrabbers.com poetic news, I wrote something for Moira Moody's Junior Fellows project.  As you may recall, I was the Junior Fellow at the Writers House last year.  It's a rather lovely prize that provides some money for a writing project, culminating in a year-end program.  Also, all prize recipients receive matching smoking jackets and gift bags from the good folks at Dell.

You can read more about Moira's project here.  You can read the aforementioned poem here.  You can read more about the Junior Fellows Prize here.   Here.  Here.  Here.

Finally, Moira will be hosting a program at the Writers House on April 22nd at 6 pm.  Save the date, children.

"Craig's Poems" -- can't stop, won't stop.

"Three Blu-Ray Discs For Sale"
How much do you want?
How about thirty?
If Blu-Ray is new, we pay ten dollars.
For ten dollars each, I can pick-up.
I will buy them.
I will take fifty.